So I don’t know if you knew but there are these new mouthwash bottles.
And when you squeeze the bottle the top fills up.
And no more will come out.
So here’s my proposition…
YOU WILL NEVER NEED A SHOT GLASS AGAIN
YOUR MOVE ALCOHOL INDUSTRY
woah that’s brilliant
Actually… I know someone who is that desperate an alcoholic that she drinks green listerine (because there is alcohol in it).
I could never be a stand up comedian I would never get through set because I’d be laughing so hard at what I was about to say
excuse me mom but whoever smelt it dealt it so it is in fact YOU who’s doing the weed
I was looking for sound effects of a duck quacking for animation and I came across this “Rubber Duck” sound and I’ve been laughing for the past five minutes
this post ruined me
So we’re just gonna walk around pretending it’s not weird that one of our hands is just worse at everything?
yo gettin married at 22 sounds a lot like leavin a party at 9:30 pm
yeah but you get to leave the party with your favorite person on the planet, and take off all of your makeup, and put on your ugly comfortable clothes and make popcorn and curl up in your bed and watch a movie, and have sex and go to sleep, idk how that sounds like a bad thing.
And everyone else just wakes up alone and hungover.